Saturday, November 10, 2012


     Am not sure how I am feeling right now, anger, frustration, sadness and many other feelings - why because for now and maybe forever I have to give up the study, I have deteriorated the last few weeks, maybe it is the heat, maybe it is the stress from exams, or maybe it is the CRPS going another stage further. My memory is shot from the meds (well I assume it is the meds), which means I am not retaining any info. Yesterday I was so out of it, there was no way I could have sat the exam.... the pain has come back in full force the last few days, again I think it is stress from the exams. It is not worth me putting myself under so much pressure, that I can not even get through a day.... so I will do the two summer papers and thats it for now, unless the magic cure is found. 

     So that then means I will have more time (and when there is a negative there is always a positive if you dig deep enough), so that means I will have time to get my business up and running.... and will give me something to focus on and enjoy, it will also give me time to promote CRPS, and get it out there, more people need to know about this horrible horrible disease, and that includes doctors, if I had been diagnosed 5 years ago after my ankle injury I would not be here today, unable to work full time ever again or even part time. If it is diagnosed early enough, then there is a high chance of remission. 

     The last few days I had not made any effort with my looks, I felt down, I looked horrible, today I changed that I did my nails, that are breaking so easy at the moment thanks to CRPS, I did my hair, shaved my legs (one positive about CRPS, I only need to shave my legs once every 6 or 8 weeks lol), and this weekend I am going to change this blog around it is to busy.... so that will be relaxing and keep me busy :)

     Chris is up in Auckland, Steph didn't go she has a part time job and needs to work on Monday, she also goes for her restricted license the following Monday, cross fingers she passes as they have made it much harder here in NZ to get your license, only 40% pass there restricted the first time, I believe it is a money hungry scheme as each time they redo it is another $80. 

     David and Chris's mate are working outside tiding it up, we are paying him so he is stoked and he is a good worker... we have figured another place where to park the car so now we have 3 car-parks and that means we are no longer moving cars out to get the one blocked in out, as Steph has a car, here dad got it for her, and a nice car it is too, much better than mine lol :).

     Anyway thats it for me for now, re: my exam, I am not sure what will happen have a doctor appointment on Monday to get an exemption for the exam, maybe I can re-sit it, have no idea at this stage will send in the paperwork and go from there I suppose. 

     Have a lovely weekend all, lovely and sunny here :)

     Today I was watering my plants and saw this flower, it has never flowered since I got it, about 2 years, it really made my day and brought a smile to my face :)


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